Happy Valentine's Day !! to everyone :D

Im so lucky to have friends who care about me. They're my REAL valentines this year.

Thanks you guys for the chocolates and sweets, it made my day!! and yes Thank You Dana for the flower :) I appreciate the gesture, as your friend.

Obstacles..

Sigh.. Tough times are what im facing now, in so many ways. Whats a girl to do?

This is what i get for wanting to help. Makes you wonder, "whats the point? Why help ANYONE!! This is the way they're gonna take it. Is it worth is??"

I can't help but think these things.. And i feel like giving up, seriously i do. My heart's hurting too much.. To know a friend has lost all faith in you, totally dissapointed with you. Should i just shut up and hope everything gets better on its own? Step up and do something about it?

Well the truth is, im scared. Really scared.. To lose a friend, to have let a friend down. I feel like crying everytime i think about it. How stupid i am. DAMN!! IM SO STUPID!!!! I wish i could just curl up and fade away, like i never existed..

That way, i cant hurt anyone anymore. Cant dissapoint anyone anymore. Cant angre anyone anymore.

Wouldnt that make everyones life a whole lot easier.

Yet.. Iv said it before. I only wanted to help. Thats who i am. Maybe i should have kept my mouth shut. Maybe i should have let you be. Or maybe, my words werent read with its subtext. My words, with all its good intentions, were taken the wrong way. Whatever it is, its too little too late now.

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Iv been sick for the past week but im finally feeling better. Thank goodness. But now iv gotta catch up on 2 days worth of work and more. Crap.

Sigh.. tomorrow's Valentine's Day.

But you know what, i think this years 14th of February is gonna be different for me, in a good way. Im finally happy. I dont feel like i need to hide behind someone elses shaddow. Happy just to be know as an individual. Proud to know that i was made in HIS image. I dont have to hope for someone to be my valentine. I dont need one. God has always been my secret valentine :D I just never saw it.

In truth, i think Valentine's Day is so over-rated. Everyday is valentine's day. Everyday is a day people should tell the people they care about that they love them.

So..

To all the people in my life, in and out of Malaysia, (and yes, you guys who're reading this too)

I LOVE YOU BEYOND WORDS!

Good times and bad times. Thats what im facing. Well, i guess i'll just have to take the good with the bad. Thats life. Without the downs, you cant appreciate the ups.

It wouldnt be called life if everything was always peachy and feel-good, thats for sure.

To you couples out there, dont cramp how you feel about your special person into one when you should be doing it all year round :)

To the singles, dont worry be happy. You've got friends and family to spread the love. :)

God is our refuge and strength.

Psalms 46:1

XOXO From yours truly. HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY <3

I'm Sorry...

I didnt know it'd end up like this.

I only wanted to help.

Whatever hurt or anger i've caused..

I am really sorry.

It's hurting me too,

to know i could have caused this

thinking i was helping..

Its just there,

in my head,

not going away..

Not until i know i'm forgiven.

Please...

Goodbye to you..

So there i was sitting in the living room, nice and comfy, when it suddenly came on the screen(tv)..

Heath Ledger is DEAD....

NOOOOOOOO....... *sob sob sob*

you will be dearly missed :(

RIP.

Cell Outin'

Last saturdays cell gathering was awesome!

Thanks so much to Shealin for opening up your home to us troublemakers :P

Hope it wasn't too much trouble.

So anyways, it was supposed to be a pot-luck thing.. but guys being guys, they brought nothing but "man power" to the table. Which wasnt actually needed cause there wasnt any heavy lifting! Well except for choon yong. At least he brought the jelly cake- which i didnt get to eat *sadnessess*. So yeah, i contributed shephard's pie (i made it myself) hehe. I was quite happy with it, could have been better but good enough. Pizza!! There was lots of pizza too.

I had alot of fun! Truly a time of bonding. We talked, watched a movie but i wasnt paying attention to it, took a bunch of pictures, laughed, ate, drive about although i didnt and probably some other stuff too. OH YEAH!!! I am sad( and slightly grossed out) to say that we tortured and killed a snail. Graphic pictures will be posted soon. And hopefully a video.

I like the part were wai kin, the recently turned 17 guy, drive like a round the park in front of shealin's house. he NEARLY hit a car TWICE, didnt look while making a turn and not to mention accelerated while jon was on the hood of pei ling's car. I repeat ON THE HOOD OF PEI LING'S CAR!!! Now that was scary. Scary but funny, after we got out of the car.

Most of the guys went on to play basketball with a couple of residents. I, not understanding why Nick was still playing with a twisted ankle, sat with rachel and mel pretending to cheer for which ever side scored. Lameness, i know. I gotta admit Ron and Darren are quite good. This coming for someone who rarely pays attention to this kinda sport. This was also the first time i met Ron. Mei San if you're reading this. I think you two are so cute!!

Moving on to a slightly more serious part of the day, I got scolded pretty bad by my dad over the phone when Shealin, Mel, Shou Yi, Nick and I were at Mcd's buying dinner for everyone. I was seriously scared.. But thankfully for Shou Yi and Mel, they calmed me down. But still, when i got home that night, i was like walking into a shooting practice where my parents were the guns and i was the potato sack they used for target practice, hypothetically speaking.

Rewinding to when i was still at shealin's place, the last hour or so I spent there, i think was what it was all about, thats the purpose of a gathering, a time where you get to know people without all the distractions and what not. Im really glad i stayed and probably wouldnt have missed it even if i was gonna get into more trouble.. Thats saying alot, you know.

I mean, i got to know alot about these friends that i had no idea about. They got to know a part of me too but after hearing their story, mine didnt feel so significant afterall. But it was a tough battle happening within me which i had to deal with on my own.

All friends can do is give advise and thats it. But thats not all i can do for this friend. I can be there for him, to listen to him if he's got anything weighing him down. But i think what he needs is to voice his real feelings towards the people that matter in his life. Then together they can overcome. And with such a great presence of God amongst them, I know they can pull through.

If you're reading this, i hope you know who you are, Im here for ya and so is everyone else. Dont keep it in :)

Marcia<3

Love is all around is, Just enbrace it already! :D

Marcus doing what he does
At the airport: marcus and i
Goodbye Kl, Hello Thailand
Just arrived, Sea Game were happening
The 3 M's

I was feeling jobless. Anyways, these are the early pictures from our thailand trip. Grr friendster isnt letting me upload my pictures so i'll just have to post it here :) I tell you, we were so happy to be going out of the country for a change, even if its just Thailand. The Thailand International Airpost is really beautiful. Better than KLIA. Unfortunately..

In a nutshell, it was Great! People were uber friendly, unlike some Malaysians.. Food was unique but kinda bland without the addition of chili and stuff. Shopping there was the BOMB!! I tell you, i think i brought back more shirts than i originally took. Hehe I got my bikini :P but i regret not getting this really pretty handbag I saw. My dad'll probably say the opposite; "You already have so many bags. You dont dont need another one,". So yeah.

From that experience, I would most definately wanna go back to Thailand again.

Till next time :)

P/s: The foot massages over there are to Die for. Not a service you can find here. Well, not as good anyway.

New and... New :P

Its alive.. ALIVE I TELL YOU!!!

My blog is finally coming alive again. Hahaha!! I shall promise to update my blog as often as my schedule permits me. But it must be understood that its an important year for alot of us and there are only 24 hours in a day. If i could do more, I would. Believe it :)

Marcia <3's>